June 18, 2011 Daddy's Day!

Sitting in the office on another hot day with humidity you could cut with Husqvarna chain saw. Jimmy Talbert is taking calls on the Trade Line program with somebody selling a set of recapped tires that would fit a Yugo or will trade the tires for a used Briggs and Straton lawn mower engine. The show is a very popular feature on Tallapoosa's broadcast voice. Jimmy does a great job with keeping up with all the things people want to buy or sell. Jimmy also is one heck of a nice fellow. This is Father's Day weekend and recently I bought a book by Harry H. Harrison, Jr. called 1001 Things It Means To Be A Dad. It is a book that you daddys out there need to keep a copy of this book in your library that features the chair that is made of porcelain and flushes. Mr. Harrison's pearls of wisdom include being a dad means not hesitating to use the words NO, NEVER, ABSOLUTELY NOT, and BECAUSE I'M YOUR DADDY! Being a dad means watching the Muppets on YouTube. Before fatherhood friends would call the house and want to know what I was up to. I'd reply something like "oh man, there is a great Clint Eastwood "Dirty Harry" movie on the satellite and he is blowing away all the crooks." After the birth of Presley and Callie when the phone rang and inquires were made as to what I was doing, I'd say "I'm playing "Candyland" and later on they want to play "Chutes and Ladders." I've learned more from the book that are true axioms on fatherhood like being a dad means sleeping outside with your kids in a tent, then around 11 p.m. everyone giving up and going back inside. Being a dad means giving the Homework Talk. No TV, no video games, no telephone calls, no laughter, no jokes, no Cokes, only life-sustaining liquids until homework is done. I've discovered that this rule actually works. Being a dad means challenging the kids to hit you in the stomach, until one day..... With our digital age here is a vital one to remember, being a dad means explaining to kids that there are creepy people out there, on the streets and on the Internet, and if they meet one, come tell you. Being a dad means limiting your kid's computer access to only child-safe sites and chat rooms. Being a dad means teaching your kids they'll meet bullies in the lunchroom, in a chat room, on the playground, even in the executive suite, and bullies HATE to be stood up to. Being a dad means sitting in a movie theater with two dolls on your left, a teddy bear on your right, and a sleeping seven-year-old on your lap. That is quite true. I have not seen a movie in 9 years that didn't have Alvin and the Chipmunks, Hannah Montana, or Disney animation. Being a dad means lecturing about money and how it's earned and how a lot of things need to be done around the house that you might be willing to pay for. I don't understand how my kids want to go with me to Designing Women when I get a haircut from LeAnne Liner and beg LeAnne and Vicki to let them sweep the salon meanwhile at the house their room looks like Rolling Stones partied in there. The book states that being a dad means teaching that actions speak louder than words and that trust isn't given, it's earned. I agree with Mr. Harrison's fatherhood axiom that it is important to talk to your kids regularly about who they are, what they like, and what they want to be. Being a dad means that you don't have to be great at something to enjoy it. Golf is an example. My kids have seen me golf and they understand the concept. Being a dad means seeing glimpses of the adult your child could become. The greatest thrills of my life aren't meeting presidents, musical and sports superstars, and being honored by the Country Music Association and Academy of Country Music. The Georgia Chapter of the Grammy Awards blessed me with a Outstanding Achievement Award and it too was a thrill. Ten years ago I was the youngest inductee into the Country Music Disc Jockey Hall of Fame in Nashville. None of those things can compare with being in the room when my daughters were born and the realization of what unconditional love is. I have wondered many times the past 9 years, how I ever lived without having my daughters in my life. I learned how to be a dad by watching my adopted sons David and McCoie. Both fine fathers who taught me how to change a diaper with one hand and how to say the words "because I'm the dad that's why!" I wish each of you dads the finest Father's Day ever. I plan on going out Sunday for Happy Meals, because I'm the dad that's why.

Rhubarb Jones is a Tallapoosa native and Director of Special Projects in the Office of Development and is a Distinguished Lecturer in the Department of Communication at Kennesaw State University. Comments may be sent to P. O. Box 1001, Tallapoosa, GA 30176 or via email at rhubarbjones@aol.com Commentaries are heard daily on WKNG 1060 at 11:05 a.m. Previous columns can be found at www.tallapoosa-journal.com